Is it Real, Though?

I know, it's been a while…but hey, that's life, right?

So, about a year and a half ago as some of you may recall, the fellowship my family and I were attending decided that they were going to go in a direction, that after much prayer and consideration, I didn't feel called to take my family into.  They were trying to get the whole fellowship to concentrate their presence into one area and were going to not gather the entire congregation any more.  They were then switching to home churches.  This would have called for me to sell or rent my house and relocate my family to another area.  Not that, for the sake of the gospel, I wouldn't do something like that. On the contrary, I couldn't move my family because I am convicted and convinced that this is precisely where God wants us to be for the foreseeable future.  Also, unable to find somewhere to rent within our price range that would be suitable for my family, it would have been an unwise choice for me as a husband, a  father, and a steward of what God has given us to make.

That said, there was also other information that was used against me, which really had little bearing on our walk as a family, my walk as a man, or the impact the gospel has had on our lives.  Was what I did wrong? Yes. But was it grounds for excommunicating me and my family? Probably not.  Yes, I still struggle with things of the flesh.  Yes, my speech is not always edifying or right. Yes, I still lust. Yes, I still fight to keep my own mind every day.

But you know what?

I'm fighting.

I'm trying every day to be a better man of God. I'm trying and praying to be a better man for my boys, for my wife, for myself, and most importantly, for the glory of the God that gives me mercy, grace and love every day.  It took some time to fight bitterness from growing in my heart.  It took love and encouragement from God's children to stifle those seeds from taking root and flourishing into hate and spite and spewing venom about all those people that were just able to so quickly turn their backs on someone they had supposedly considered family just days prior.

After the Lord gave us a great fellowship of believers here in our own neighborhood, the ONE true friend I have that still attended our old fellowship informed me that they were going back to the way they did things before my family and I left. The reasons they have for returning to this way are varied, and I only pray God's best for them.  I have always only ever loved them and wished God's blessings for them.  I don't even know if they know that.  If they knew us, they'd know it's true.

The purpose of this post is not to say I was right or anything the like.  The purpose of this post is to ask, if someone is truly part of The Family of God, like you say they are, how is it so easy to just "excommunicate" someone after they've committed what you consider a grievous enough sin?  How could you just have gone so cold so quickly towards me and my family?  How could you turn your backs so abruptly on our sister?  Were our sins so grave that they brought utter shame to Christ's name? Were our sins so severe that we're now living lives that have no evidence of God's grace or love or mercy?

I would be hard pressed to say yes.  God's love, forgiveness, grace, and mercy are still ever present in our lives.  Having been through the emotions that my beloved sister is now going through, my Mrs and I have been talking with her and praying for her.  I don't know if you'll read this, but I write it to encourage everyone out there that God's grace and love are bigger than any failure we've suffered or felt we've had imposed on us.  Our God's love and forgiveness is more massive than us failing to walk on the path the way that you've instructed us to do so.

We deeply appreciated your community, relationship, love, and friendship. So, I ask…in the end, was it real?

Where is God?

For a long time now, I've had this brewing, and with yesterday's tragedy, it just brought it all to a head, in my head.  Please please please read it all the way through.  If it doesn't seem to make sense, and you get angry, just read it all the way through so you can REALLY hate me.  But know that God loves you regardless.

• 5 million children a year die from hunger and malnutrition, around the world
• Hundreds of thousands of women, children and men are raped every year
• Women, children and men are sold in to sexual slavery around the world to be exploited till they are either too old, sick with disease, or dead
• Men, women, and children are killed and their organs harvested and sold on the black market
• Over 12 million babies have been aborted since the turn of the century
• There was a murder every 36 minutes, in 2011, in the United states
• Of those murders, 8,552 were committed with a gun of some kind
• Of THOSE murders, 1,220 were committed in the state of California
• A large majority of the world lives at or beneath the poverty line (Israel's poverty line is $7.30 per person per day)

I could run off a list of facts that would just continue to enrage or depress you, or both.  The point is, we live in a world that is overflowing with injustice, depravity, death, greed, and pollution.  Some still cry out, "Where is God?"  God has not left.  God is still sitting, waiting to be called on by His creations which He loves and seeks to redeem.  

"But if He is God, why does He allow such evil to happen?  Why would he allow His creation to suffer so much?  Why would He ALLOW children to die of hunger, rape, murder, and all the other evil things that happen every second of every day around the world?"  So many people use these questions to get angry with God.  So many people are blind to the simple truth.

God has ever been present in our lives and world, and is but a heartbeat away from producing a life-altering change within us that would transform our lives, our families, our communities, our cities, and inevitably, the world.  Change does start with one person, Christ.  Only He can change our hearts and fill them with a wonderful love for our neighbors and neighborhood.  And a neighborhood is the basis of community.  To live in community, through Christ, would radically change many things.  

1.  The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it. John 1:5   The darkness could not hide if we were bound in community through Christ.  What does this mean?  It means that truly perverse people with dark hard hearts would flee from the people of God to seek a safer place to do their evil deeds.  They would not be able to abide in the truth and light of God and His people.  

2.  Also, there would not be one person in the community that did not feel loved.  There are literally dozens of verses in the Bible that speak of the community of God loving one another.  With this, no one would feel depressed or alone or abandoned.  God's love brings us into community and His community is filled with love.

But, without realizing that we are poor, needy, destitute sinners that can offer God nothing but our surrender to His love, we can only stand in our pride, which is nothing but filthy rags when compared to a mighty and everlasting God.  Think about this, say you're wrong about God existing and when you die you stand before Him and say, "Well, I was a good person."  He will say to you " 'I tell you, I do not know where you come from. Depart from me, all you workers of evil!' Luke 13:27."  You can bring God NOTHING.  But even so, He still wants to bless you and me, sinners, with more than we could ever imagine.  

God wants you and me to see how much we need Him.  He wants us to turn away from our evil deeds, from our selfish ways, and to turn to Him and say, "Lord, here I am, create in me a clean heart."  He wants us to see how much change He can do in us and through us for our family, our neighbors, our city and the world to see.

Don't get angry because God doesn't step in and stamp out evil with one breath.  He most certainly could, but He doesn't.  Why?  Because He is filled with mercy and His heart breaks that everyone would know Him as Father.  Don't look to Washington, DC to solve our problems, because they are only corrupt men and women, just like us.  The change must start with us.  The change must come from Christ.

Now, you might think these the ramblings of a crazy person.  I'm ok with that.  Just know that I'm not talking about starting up our own "Christian City" where we're all safe from evil and we don't let anyone not with us in.  No, quite the contrary, I'm saying that we need to put our lives for Christ on display, right where they are, in our neighborhoods, jobs, and cities, for the world to see and feel God's love and know Him in spirit and in truth.

God has not left you friend.  He is knocking at the door of your heart.