Is it Real, Though?

I know, it's been a while…but hey, that's life, right?

So, about a year and a half ago as some of you may recall, the fellowship my family and I were attending decided that they were going to go in a direction, that after much prayer and consideration, I didn't feel called to take my family into.  They were trying to get the whole fellowship to concentrate their presence into one area and were going to not gather the entire congregation any more.  They were then switching to home churches.  This would have called for me to sell or rent my house and relocate my family to another area.  Not that, for the sake of the gospel, I wouldn't do something like that. On the contrary, I couldn't move my family because I am convicted and convinced that this is precisely where God wants us to be for the foreseeable future.  Also, unable to find somewhere to rent within our price range that would be suitable for my family, it would have been an unwise choice for me as a husband, a  father, and a steward of what God has given us to make.

That said, there was also other information that was used against me, which really had little bearing on our walk as a family, my walk as a man, or the impact the gospel has had on our lives.  Was what I did wrong? Yes. But was it grounds for excommunicating me and my family? Probably not.  Yes, I still struggle with things of the flesh.  Yes, my speech is not always edifying or right. Yes, I still lust. Yes, I still fight to keep my own mind every day.

But you know what?

I'm fighting.

I'm trying every day to be a better man of God. I'm trying and praying to be a better man for my boys, for my wife, for myself, and most importantly, for the glory of the God that gives me mercy, grace and love every day.  It took some time to fight bitterness from growing in my heart.  It took love and encouragement from God's children to stifle those seeds from taking root and flourishing into hate and spite and spewing venom about all those people that were just able to so quickly turn their backs on someone they had supposedly considered family just days prior.

After the Lord gave us a great fellowship of believers here in our own neighborhood, the ONE true friend I have that still attended our old fellowship informed me that they were going back to the way they did things before my family and I left. The reasons they have for returning to this way are varied, and I only pray God's best for them.  I have always only ever loved them and wished God's blessings for them.  I don't even know if they know that.  If they knew us, they'd know it's true.

The purpose of this post is not to say I was right or anything the like.  The purpose of this post is to ask, if someone is truly part of The Family of God, like you say they are, how is it so easy to just "excommunicate" someone after they've committed what you consider a grievous enough sin?  How could you just have gone so cold so quickly towards me and my family?  How could you turn your backs so abruptly on our sister?  Were our sins so grave that they brought utter shame to Christ's name? Were our sins so severe that we're now living lives that have no evidence of God's grace or love or mercy?

I would be hard pressed to say yes.  God's love, forgiveness, grace, and mercy are still ever present in our lives.  Having been through the emotions that my beloved sister is now going through, my Mrs and I have been talking with her and praying for her.  I don't know if you'll read this, but I write it to encourage everyone out there that God's grace and love are bigger than any failure we've suffered or felt we've had imposed on us.  Our God's love and forgiveness is more massive than us failing to walk on the path the way that you've instructed us to do so.

We deeply appreciated your community, relationship, love, and friendship. So, I ask…in the end, was it real?

The Beauty and Blessing That is Woman: The Beginning

**This is a blog series that I'm writing in tandem with a good friend, Ronel Sidney.  I really think that the Lord gave us this purpose, to come together and write something to build and bless and share His knowledge and wisdom.  I want to pray through and bless you with as much of God's word as I can.**

With that said, my start will be...at the beginning.  Or at least within a couple days of the beginning.

Genesis 2:18-23 (ESV) The verses will be in blue, and my commentary will be in black. Then the LORD God said, "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him." Read what it says.  It says that God saw man's need for a "helper fit for him."  It doesn't say a servant that was inferior to him.  It doesn't say a slave who would do everything he said.  It says a "helper fit for him."  It's clearly pointing out that man needed someone to walk with him, to help him in life, and to love him.  Now out of the ground the LORD God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. Here we see some of the work the man had done before Eve was made.  He was naming all of the creatures.  Also, it's pointing out that everything, including man, was made "from the earth."  But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him.  Despite all his work, and looking, Adam could not find a "helper fit for him."  He could not find the companionship or help that his soul needed.  He could not find the help and love that the Lord knew he required.  So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. And the rib that the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. Really, God anesthetized Adam, took a rib out, and made Eve.  It was from man, that God made woman.  It seems only fitting that one of Adam's ribs was used.  I'm sure some of us have heard some of the reasons God used a rib:

1. God did not use a piece of his skull so that woman would not believe herself to be above her man
2. God did not use one of his toes so that man would not believe himself above his woman
3. God used a rib because it was on Adams side, where Eve was to walk with him...right next to him
4. God used a rib because Adam was meant to keep Eve safe, under his arms
5. God used a rib because it was near to Adam's heart

These are wonderful reasons our God did things the way He did.  The deliberate and intentional love contained in just creation itself reveals a lot about the relationship between man and woman.  Man and woman are to work together, walk together, love each other, and be one flesh.  How can the right hand do good work without the left hand?  Can the right hand hate the left hand?  No.  And as such, man and woman are to work together, under the Lord, for His glory.

With that said, while we walk together, our jobs and callings will be different.  God, in His sovereignty, has seen fit to hold man ultimately accountable for his family and their spiritual shepherding.  This does not mean that the woman plays no part, but simply that God will hold the man ultimately accountable in the end.

Look at what happened in Genesis 3.  Woman is deceived into eating from the forbidden tree.  And the Bible says that she just turned around and gave some to Adam and he ate.  And they saw they were naked, and sewed fig leaves together.  Then they heard God walking through the Garden in the cool of the day.  Imagine how ashamed and afraid of their loving Creator they had to be, to hide on such a perfect and wonderful day.  And then God calls out to the man.  They have a discussion.  God brings His discipline and judgement, with a promise of the Messiah.  

But, in the end, He held Adam accountable for what his wife had done.  Adam tried to pass the buck, but God wasn't having it.  God made it clear that Adam should have shepherded and guarded his bride's heart against the serpent.  Regardless of who sinned first, the judgement was heaviest on the man.  God may have multiplied Eve's pain in childbirth, but God cursed the earth because of Adam.  God said in Genesis 3:17-19"...cursed is the ground because of you; in pain you shall eat of it all the days of your life; thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for you; and you shall eat the plants of the field. By the sweat of your face you shall eat bread, till you return to the ground, for out of it you were taken; for you are dust, and to dust you shall return."  

No matter how man and woman were called to walk together, man was held in judgement for his wife's actions and his lack of action.  This is how God said it is to be.  Some people, men and women, might take issue with this.  They might call God "unfair" or "unjust."  Who are we to say that our almighty God is unfair and unjust in how He has planned out for things to be?  We are to live according to His purpose and rest in His sovereignty.  Does this mean that God does not make exceptions? No.  He absolutely has.  But His plan and intention has never changed.

In part 2, I will address some of those women that God chose and the Proverbs 31 woman.  I pray that this has been a good beginning to us finding ourselves not in what we believe is our identity and our sense of justice, but in God's grace, power, and love.