Wait a minnit...

FIRST OFF...if you read this, I love you. I absolutely do. I want nothing but the best for every single one of my friends, fb or real. Now...where was I...oooooooh yeeeeaaaah...so, I was thinking...

God's grace and mercy are vast and infinite; so much so that every one of His creations that is able to receive it may become one of His children.

Wrap your peabrains around that...it makes all knowledge ever obtained by man, everything we've ever accomplished on this gift of a planet that we've shit on, small unimportant nothing. The fact that you can recognize God is who He is and that He will love you regardless of our faults and imperfections...that's amazing.

The atheist worships his confidence in the fact that there is no God, and he is a fool. Since the beginning, "the fool says in his heart, 'There is no God'"...just look at the evidence. To chalk it all up to mere chance and evolution...ARE YOU SERIOUS?! hahaha...that's tragic comedy. God makes Himself known and evident in all His creation...its simple. And its that very same profound simplicity that makes the intelligent to stumble. But whatever, atheism is another topic for another day. I'm just trying to point out how MASSIVELY good God is and how much He really and truly wants to impact the life of everyone in the world.

But it is YOUR heart that must accept it. It is YOUR heart that must receive it. You may say, God isn't fair. Who says He has to be fair? The fact that He's chosen NOT to send ALL of us to hell instantaneously is an ENORMOUS amount grace in and of itself. The fact that He gives US a LIFETIME to find Him and get to know Him the way we should, well that's just even MORE unmerited favor AND mercy in our box. It is YOUR heart that is hard and refuses to believe in that which you can not see or justify. You bring secular attacks against the infinite God that will judge you or save you in the end. That's like an ant trying to storm the castle by itself.

If you read this, I love you. I only hope that you know the peace, joy, hope, love, grace and mercy of the one true God that seeks to save you from your own strength, which is no strength at all. He seeks to save you from the things you think you know, which is nothing. Now, this does not mean that He wants dumb, uninformed lemmings that believe what they're spoonfed. No. The Bible calls for us to be able to give an answer to any man for the reason for the hope inside us. And I want to be able to do that. He wants to make your life prosperous and blessed.

That's all my friends, loved ones, family, and acquaintances...may your life not be wasted on pride and vanity of this world. Because without God, that's all that there is out there.

Hard Days...every day.

When your spirit is troubled, which, if you're like me (and you are because you're human), is just about every day, don't worry about it. There is nothing in this world that should cause your mind or heart or spirit to be troubled. There is a place of rest that you can turn to. When the skies are dark, and you feel the pressure coming down on you...telling you that you're not worth it, or that there's nothing to look forward to, or that nothing will ever change no matter how much you fight...be still and know that you don't have to fight.

When you feel like nothing means anything any more and everyone has abandonded you, let your soul be at ease and feel peace. Know that you are loved from since before you were born. Since before you were ever a thought present in anyone's mind, you are loved. When everything falls apart and your hope has whithered away in front of you, cry and be comforted. Let all your fears and worries and stress and walls crumble under the love that wishes to elevate you from the stagnant, stale, dead air which you can't survive in.

When you scream for life, and love, and freedom...know that God will be there till you realize that He is your deliverer.

To all my beloved friends and family,

Thank you so much for all the love you showed me yesterday. It may only be the internet, but I thank you all for making me feel remembered. All the gifts I received are special to me and I love them. And now, I offer you all the greatest gift that I can possibly give any of you.

I truly do love you all, and hope you all read these words.

I am here to tell you all that I pray for you all and keep you all in my heart and thoughts. I pray you all know the love of God and come to know Him intimately. That His love may fill the emptiness that we all feel. And we ALL do have that emptiness. We try to fill it with other things...and yet nothing fills it and satisfies us. I pray that you draw near to God, and know true love and life in its fullness.

I'm not TRYING to preach, but if you feel convicted or even curious, I'm glad. I thank you all, and love you and miss your smiling faces. I pray to see you all again soon, that we might share a beer and a laugh. BUT, I only have 9 Yuengling left (THANKS NEIL AND JENNIFER!!!), so we'll have to find another beer to share!

And my heart, thank you for all your love...I thank God for you every day. I pray that we only increase in faith, and love, and that our last days together be as filled with His love as our first days together my love. I love you and thank you for every bit of love that you gave me yesterday. What I gave you was a small gift of appreciation for being the greatest gift God has placed in my life. My friend, my lover, my companion, my beloved heart. I love you.

BEERFEST!

So yesterday was the 12th annual Mobile Beerfest. Its 31 bars and 3 beers per bar for 20$. Do the beers repeat? I don't know or care much. Its more of a way of Mobile to raise money for Bayfest than a way of actually showing off the locally brewed bears. Do I care much? Not really. I took off with one of the guys because I was DD'ing for him and that was ok too.

A bunch of guys we were trying to catch up were hopping around, making it a little more difficult for us to catch up with them. We walked around and ended up running into a bunch of non-Navy people that live here in the complex. It was alright. I met a couple of cool guys name Oscar and Jared. Oscar is half Mexican and half Italian. He and Jared think I'm some kind of comedian or something. He called me "primo" the whole night. I didn't really get it, but hey, if it makes him feel more Mexican, ORALE! He's from Forth Worth and got a ration and a half of shit for being from Texas. He took it like a champ. hahaha!

So the guy that I'm DD'ing for ends up taking off to...somewhere without telling me and I end up hanging out with one of the guys that we FINALLY caught up with. Good guy. The OTHER guys ended up going to another bar and we ended up...something. Hahaha...it was a long night so I don't remember all of it. We ended up walking in their general direction so we could catch up with them and we stop at a hot dog stand. I'm not a fan of hot dogs so we get one for my buddy.

There's two women standing there waiting for their order and we end up chit chatting with them. So picture this: We're at a hot dog stand, waiting on my buddies dog and we start chit chatting with these two women that are CLEARLY NOT Mobilites. I was getting some weirdish vibes and then one of them says, "I brought her and our kid out here." Ok...now as my friends you know where I stand with the whole homosexuality thing, but now RE-EXAMINE the situation! I'm standing there with my buddy at a hot dog stand talking to two lesbians who end up being from near our respective hometowns...and they're waiting on their hot dogs.

WITH EVERY FIBER OF MY BEING I FOUGHT THE URGE TO BURST INTO TEARS LAUGHING AND ASK THEM IF THIS WAS HOW THEY GOT THEIR DAILY ALLOWANCE OF HOT WEINER!!! BLAHAHAHAHA!!!

We left the ladies to their hot dogs and resumed to walking in the direction of the rest of our people. But it turns out my buddy was still hungry so we stopped and had a couple beers and a pizza at this DELICIOUS pizzeria/restaurant called Buck's pizza. Talked to our waiter, Nick, whose apparently planning on moving out to L.A. in 2 months time. The pizza was delicious.

So we THEN do some more walking only to find them walking back our direction. And we all spend the rest of the evening at the place we started off initially meeting at. We picked up a couple of uninviteds, but whatever. Good times had by all.

Even with all the good times and distraction I had last night, all I wanted was to be home and in bed kissing my love. To have her near me and know that our little ones were safe and sound...and ASLEEP in their own beds...hahaha...

As the Pigeons Fly

I have to tell the truth
I have a weakness for women
In every state wherever I go
I know it isn't right I feel I'm barely swimming
And the waves keep on crashing down
After every show (Oh boy)
And what am I to do now
Where the hell is my crew now
Supposed to be watching my back
But they're jibbing too
And here she stands before me
And I'm trying to ignore thee
Possible chance of doing wrong
And now I sing my song

What is love, and am I in it
I really like girl and I think I should
What I feel, is there something in it
Cause if not I'm wasting her time
And that's just not good

I'm in the mall in Altadena
Looking through a new magazine
Takin' a little love test to see
If I'm even there
And now it's looking like I'm failing
And now I'm slowly inhaling
Is this issue of Sassy's for real
If so the next step's ill
And dude I'm way past confused now
What do I have to do now
Break up with the girl of my dreams
In the past made mistakes and
Regret every step so I say

And if I don't know what to say
And I'm just standing there in a daze
Please don't walk away so soon
My lady this it might just bloom
And if I don't know what to say
And I'm still standing there in a daze
Please don't walk away from me
Cause I am trapped now set me free

I have to tell the truth (ninjas)
Right now I have a girlfriend (uh oh)
And she'll probably break up with me
After hearing this song (it's like that)
But what am I to do ( I don't know)
I gotta share what I'm feeling (share it boy)
Cause if I can't tell the truth
Then there's something wrong
So I still ask

So I have to ask, So I have to ask
Da da dada, da da dadaadaa
I like you, I hate you
I want you, I love you
I like you, I hate you
I want you, I love you